Is there a ghost in my house?

I cannot believe how cold it has been lately! It's fantastic!

The cold weather has prompted some stodgy eating on my part. Baked potatoes with chutney and a fantastic farmhouse cheddar, gingery pear crisp, sweet potato soup, butternut squash patties, and a variety of other stodgy wintery dishes. It's been great.

Tomorrow for breakfast I am going to have the last of the bread I baked a couple days ago toasted up with the last of the compound butter I have in my freezer. Mmm. That's gonna get me raring to go for the arduous task of cleaning out my car in preparation for tomorrow's adventure. What adventure? My friend is accompanying me to attend a taping of the Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson! YAY! If you are unaware of my appreciation for The Late Late Show and Craig Ferguson, clearly you haven't spent much time around me. Ah, Craig Ferguson. His show is one of the consistently bright spots in the general darkness of insomnia.

I've prepped some stuff to take as a picnic lunch for us tomorrow. We'll be having cheese and chutney sandwiches, tangy slaw, crisps and millionaire shortbread. Nothing fancy but super yummy.

At the moment, life is good.

Can we fix it?

Yes we can!

If you're wondering why I have the Bob the Builder theme stuck in my head - you're not alone. For some reason I've had horrible UK Christmas number 1s running through my head all day. I'm about ready to stab myself in the eye with any sharp object I can find.

If you're really bored have a peek at this. I love novelty betting. Not to actually bet, but to laugh hysterically at what people are daft enough to bet on.

It's about time.

Right. So I like Jamie Oliver. I like the fact that he puts his money where his mouth is, and even more importantly - he physically gets involved. He's been proactive about sustainable farming, humane treatment of livestock, etc. His work with school lunches, Fifteen, and the Ministry of Food is great. I've been watching the tv series Jamie's Ministry of Food again in preparation to compare/contrast with the new US version which is being jointly produced with ABC and set to begin early next year.

Even with the second go round it still completely boggles my mind that people can live like that. Every once in a while I enjoy eating take-out or fast food, but it's something I quickly bore of and nearly always get sick from. Nightly? I'd rather stab myself in the eye repeatedly with a pencil.

Fair enough. Because of life-threatening food allergies (allium: onion, garlic - basically the whole bloody lily family) I don't have the luxury of resorting to convenience foods the way that most people do. (I recently went into anaphylaxis and had to use my TwinJect because the lemon in the iced tea I'd ordered at a drive-through had been stored with the onion. Good times. A $1000 emergency room visit later...) Moreover, my mom died when I was a kid so I had to learn to cook for myself or I wouldn't have been able to eat. It's not like I started out making anything more complex than scrambled eggs, pancakes or pasta with butter and cheese. But after a while the scrambled eggs became omelettes, the pasta with butter and cheese became pasta carbonara and the pancakes became scones.

I understand that time is a big impediment to cooking for a lot of people. Personally, I don't think it takes any more time to throw something together at home than it does to head to your nearest greasy spoon and pick something up. The financial as well as physical benefits from cooking for yourself are tremendous compared to eating convenience foods. I just don't get it. I really don't.

All of my friends know how to cook (although some of them prefer not to). If they didn't, I would gladly embrace the "pass it on" mentality and invite people over to share a meal and learn how to prepare that meal.

Thinking about the meals I regularly prepare for myself, I'd say at least 90% of them take 30 minutes or less from start to finish. Sure, sometimes I decide to go all "culinary school" and make insanely complicated and time/labor-intensive dishes, but generally speaking it's more a case of, "hrm, I'm hungry, what's in the pantry?" and bang, 20 minutes later I'm eating. And yeah, sometimes I can't be bothered and I eat toast with peanut butter and a piece of fruit for dinner. But even that is still a far cry healthier for me than bloody take-out.

Raindrops falling on my head.

I loathe cooking dinner. Loathe. That said, I do manage to throw something together most nights - and when I really can't be arsed - toast is my friend.

A "go to" meal for me at least one night a week, is bubble'n'squeak or rumbledethumps or slump, whatever you want to call it. It's basically a concoction of potato and/or turnip, cabbage or other greens, in some cases egg and in some cases cheese. Heck, in some cases all of the above. You can use meat if you like - generally some sort of bacon. I don't, but that's personal preference. I like the concept, but I am not a purist at all.

Heat a mix of butter and olive oil in a reasonably sized skillet (if you are using bacon, you want cook that off first, remove the bacon and mix that with the rest of your ingredients, adding enough butter/oil to the bacon grease remaining in the pan to get a decent quantity). Get a biggish bowl and toss in cooked potato/turnip - boiled, mashed, even left over roasties can work here. Smash this up a bit with a cooking utensil of some variety, personally I find spoons to be rather useful. To your potatoes add in some cabbage. If you're feeling industrious you can dice up cabbage, if you're feeling lazy feel free to use bagged shredded cabbage, or if you happen to have some leftover cooked cabbage use that. If you want to add an egg or two, just whisk it up and add to the mixture. Add salt, pepper and whatever other seasoning your little heart desires. If you want it creamy, add some milk or cream. Mix/mash everything up and then put it in your heated skillet. Kind of press it down a bit. You want to cook and stir it for, eh, 10 minutes or so until you get the yum golden brown bits all kinda mixed through. Then you want to smash the mixture down a bit and let it cook for another 5-10 minutes or so. At this point you'll have a pretty decent crust on one side. Personally, I like to flip it over and crust up the other side. At this point you're good to go. For me, I like to melt a little cheese on top and top with hot sauce and ketchup. Hey - I said it was tasty, not that it was pretty or particularly classy.

Alternately, once you have the mixture together you can put it in a greased baking dish and put it under the broiler for a few minutes until golden brown. If I was doing this, I'd probably add some milk or cream.

Also, I suppose in theory you could actually use freshly cooked veg - but I'm sure as hell not that industrious.

Depending on the greens to starch ratio, it's pretty darn balanced. I also love it cold the next day as it kind of resembles a frittata. But if you're someone who simply must have a well-balanced meal, serve it with a tossed salad.

Just sittin' here watching the wheels.

Anyone else dream about wheels of cheese - or is that just me?

Today I've been reading and enjoying, "The Complete Book of Cheese" by Bob Brown. I am particularly enamored by "Sixty-five Sizzling Rabbits" and a list of cheese sandwiches that would intimidate all but the most cheese-obsessed. Perhaps most amusing is the language. For example, the "He-man Sandwich" recipe directs readers to, "Butter a thick slice of dark rye bread, cover with a layer of mashed cold baked beans and a slice of ham, then one of Swiss cheese and a wheel of Bermuda onion topped with mustard and a sowing of capers." Sowing is a much better word for sprinkling, don't you think?

My bed-time reading for the last few days has been, "The Cheeses & Wines of England & France with Notes on Irish Whiskey" by John Ehle. It's been most pleasurable. It is, "a genial guide to making cheeses and wines at home, plus history, anecdotes and other interesting lore about two of man's oldest crafts." In the introduction the author writes, "Our best - the local and individual and traditional - is being battered down and strewn about by mass production and mass merchandising ... Isn't it a pity that out of our potentially rich diversity comes such protected sameness?"

Word.

What I find stunning, is that the book was first published in 1972, completely predating the current Artisanal resurgence in cheese and wine craft (and baking, my other love).

Yesterday a friend asked me what food I would select if I lived in Hypothetical Land (a magical land with no scurvy or other vitamin deficiencies) and could only eat one food for the rest of my life. Without pause I replied, "cheese." Of course, if I lived in Even Better Hypothetical Land, I'd be able to add bread, fruit and relishes to that list.

Seriously, is there anything in this world better than a cheese toastie with some sort of chutney or relish on it and a scalding hot cup of tea? I don't think so. However, if you disagree with me, feel free to present your argument.

Everything is possible.

I love piccalilli. What I do not love, is making it. I'm not one for canning things; it takes too much time and effort and I prefer instant gratification - or as close to as possible.

I spent some time thinking about what I like in a piccalilli - sweet, mustardy, vinegary tang and still a hint of crunch to the vegetables.

In that spirit I present my "instant" piccalilli which I love on everything from a cheese sandwich to a baked potato.

I mix together prepared yellow mustard and a grainy mustard. You're looking for about a cup total of mustard, in whatever ratio you like. I tend to go with 70:30 yellow to grainy. To this mixture add a tablespoon or two of sweetener, brown sugar or honey work well. Then add a tablespoon or so of vinegar. Basically anything but balsamic, and you can even use the vinegary brine from the pickles. Then add the veggies of your choice. Standard would be really finely diced dill pickles, finely diced cucumber, finely diced red pepper, finely diced cauliflower and even sauerkraut (if you do use sauerkraut be sure to rinse and thoroughly dry). You're looking for about a cup of veggies in total, you an add more or less depending on how wet you want your piccalilli. Cover it and chill for at least a couple of hours in the fridge before use. It doesn't keep, so be sure to make only what you're going to use for a day or two.

A series of blurs, like I never occurred.

I can't get Felicity in Turin out of my head for some reason. It's no secret that Paul Durcan is my favorite poet - and though not my favorite poem of his, for some reason it's the one I've been thinking of lately. I suppose it's just a reflection of autumn bringing out my maudlin side. Heh.

In-between, without you.

I don't miss her anymore, I miss the idea of her. Maybe that's worse.

I'm 10 years younger than she was when she died.

I've lived 17 years of my life without her.

It's strange to consider that the single most defining moment of your life happened before you even hit puberty.

Just after a glimmer...

I just purged my kitchen of all animal protein. No ice cream. No cheese. No cultured Irish and european butter. (The last being the only difficult item to surrender.)

I am officially back to vegan. I did it for seven years, I imagine I can do it again. I may at one point opt to reintroduce a few select animal proteins into my diet - but not for a while.

It's not a religious thing, it's a health thing. It didn't really help before, but I am hoping that this go round the exclusion of animal protein from my diet will help with the inflammation - and I already know it'll help with my kidneys.

Now comes the fun part - concocting things to eat!

Do you never wonder?

I really don't know how I feel about this. I know there's this push to punish the last of the Nazi war criminals, and the reason being that within the next few years the last of their surviving victims will be gone. Still, what is life imprisonment really going to be? A year, maybe 2? Is it worth it? Not even going into the moral and philosophical questions - redemption, etc., the financial cost and the drain on the tax payers and other resources... I just don't know.

'Tis the gift to be free.

I've been re-reading McCullough's biography of John Adams. What a truly fascinating man. I think we forget just how complicated our "founding fathers" were.

Hell, look at Jefferson. 33 years old and he wrote the damn Declaration of Independence! An enlightened scientifically minded humanist - who owned slaves. It's that not complicated, I don't rightly know what is.

Everything will be fine.

God, what a miserable few days of weather!

The heat is overwhelming. I wake up every morning feeling like I am being smothered. I want October.

I did have a yummy salad - asparagus, snow peas, and radishes in a dijon vinaigrette. Mmm. Next time I think I'll add some pasta.

Summertime and the livin' is easy.

And cheap!

There are many things I despise about where I live - the weather, the pretentiousness, the obsession with outward appearance, the irresponsible consumption and so much more.

However, I love summer produce. For $7.48 I just purchased:

3 cantaloupe

3 honeydew

2 pounds of green beans

5 pounds of peaches

20 pounds of potatoes

1 pint blueberries

3 pints raspberries

1 pint blackberries

Hooray!

I mentioned to a friend earlier when talking about food that there are a few food items which I think are always awesome. Sandwiches, "dumplings" (and I use this term loosely to mean "stuff inside of some sort of carby goodness", pierogi, calzone, gyoza, samosas, burritos, etc., and yes, having gone to culinary school I am fully aware of the actual definition of a dumpling, but so fucking what?), pasta and jacket potatoes are pretty much the best things ever. Just about everything is good in one (or all!) of these forms.

That said, there is absolutely no excuse for what I am currently eating, but cold leftover spaghetti sandwiches are tasty.

The hardest part.

I honestly have no idea how I feel about this.

I'm sorry, Dave. I'm afraid I can't do that.

To assist you in eating more salad, I provide you with the following:

2-3 cups cooked rice, barley, spelt, pasta, potatoes, couscous, noodles, etc.

1-2 cups veggies and/or fruit - raw, roasted, steamed, blanched, frozen or even canned if so inclined.

1/4-1/2 cup "goodies" - cheese, olives, capers, dried fruits, dried veggies, nuts, marinated artichoke hearts, hard-boiled egg, meat, sun-dried tomatoes, avocado, herbs

3 tablespoons - 1/4 cup dressing - vinaigrette, barbeque sauce, pesto, citrus juice with oil, dijon mustard, your favorite bottled dressing, peanut butter

Think about flavor combinations you enjoy. If you like mexican food, make a salad with a spanish rice base, add black beans, corn, tomatoes, and a chipotle-lime dressing. If you like mediterranean flavors, mix couscous, fava or garbanzo beans, cucumber, tomato, chopped parsley and or/mint, and toss with a dressing made with tahini, olive oil and garlic. If you like greek, use couscous, olives, feta cheese, cucumber, and a dressing incorporating lemon, oregano, and olive oil.

See? Salad is easy.

Thought is suspect.

I don't post specific recipes here, but tonight's concoction was so damn good I couldn't resist sharing. Why am I posting this in the wee hours? Because it is so bloody hot here I can only cook in the wee hours.

Inspired by the bowl of key limes I had sitting on my counter along with some asparagus I picked up at the farmer's market this weekend I decided to modify a recipe for this japanese soba dish I saw once - and though I remembered the gist of.

The dressing:

2 or so tablespoons of soy sauce

2 or so tablespoons hoisin sauce

1-2 teaspoons of lime juice

1 teaspoon of agave (You could use sugar)

Sriracha to taste. I probably used 2 teaspoons or so.

(A tablespoon or so of peanutbutter would be an awesome addition to the sauce.)

So, I didn't have soba noodles on hand, but I wanted noodles, so I boiled up about 1/2 a pound of spaghetti, then rinsed under cold water, tossed with a splash of canola oil and set aside. I steamed 2 bundles of asparagus and then chopped into bite sized pieces. I seeded and chopped up a sweet red pepper, and then chopped a small zucchini into bite sized pieces. I mixed all the veggies with the noodles, poured the sauce over and mixed well.

Yum!

A sound that rushes over me.

I enjoyed the Coldplay concert - didn't think I would. In fact, I rather expected it to make my ears bleed. The tribute to Michael Jackson was unexpected and rather sweet. I think G had a good time, and that was the point. Her first concert being ANYTHING other than The Jonas Brothers will be appreciated greatly later in life.

Warm fuzzies: Souvenirs available included re-usable water bottles, canvas bags and bracelets from Made With Love.

Agitation: The venue was exclusively Coca Cola - and Coca Cola is evil. I'd wager that most of you have not read Mark Thomas' Belching Out the Devil, but if you should do so, I'd wager most of you would make an effort to never again consume a Coca Cola product - or soda in general, for that matter.

Live the unexamined life.

I remember learning a song when I was in school (no secret that I went to private religious school - if you know anything about the California public school system in the 1980s you know why) that still irritates me to this day. The only lyric I remember is this: "I'm a k-i-d, I'm a kid of a king, I'm a k-i-d not a monkey!" What the hell is that? Seriously.

I honestly don't remember anything about my science classes - except for one really cool biology teacher in junior high who, while a religious man, didn't attempt to shove his views down our throats. In a religious school that takes balls. Hell, this was a school where one of the most popular teachers ever was shunned because it was discovered she'd had a child out of wedlock. Oh the horror! Someone with such questionable morals obviously couldn't be trusted with the care of young and impressionable minds. <--- that was sarcasm, in case you didn't catch it.

Belief systems are great. I don't go out of my way to verbally eviscerate anyone's belief system (okay, well maybe Tom Cruise's - but who doesn't?), but I do get huffy when people have the audacity to espouse the scientific validity of "intelligent design." Science, my ass.

Fair play though, to Dr. Francis Collins who is a brilliant scientific mind, and also a theist and doesn't find any conflict between the two worlds. Kenneth Connor, however, can kiss my ass.

It's just a dying romance.

I've decided it is impossible to be in a bad mood when partaking of ripe summer nectarines. Mmm. Every week I go to the local farmer's market and pick up my produce for the week, and every week I am delighted to discover something new and delicious. This week I met a vendor selling "Super Sweet and Ugly Peaches" - made me laugh. Talk about truth in advertising! It's no secret I've gone back to my vegetarian ways, much easier to do in summer when the produce is abundant and not so easy to do the rest of the year when I can't rely on the traditional staples - legumes, soy, etc. because of having to limit my protein intake.

Anyone who knows me knows that I am well into the slow food movement. I was a disciple of Alice Waters and her ilk long before it was fashionable to be so. Watching the growth of this movement has pleased me. I was thinking about my food influences recently and this is what I concluded:

Thomas Keller is a genius, an inspiration and an Icon, Alice Waters and Mollie Katzen have had the most influence on how I shop and how I cook on a daily basis - but Peter Reinhart is my god.

In the 1918 edition of The Boston Cooking-School Cook Book, Fannie Farmer wrote,

"BREAD is the most important article of food, and history tells of its use thousands of years before the Christian era . . . The study of bread making is of no slight importance, and deserves more attention than it receives.

Considering its great value, it seems unnecessary and wrong to find poor bread on the table; and would that our standard might be raised as high as that of our friends across the water ! Who does not appreciate the loaf produced by the French baker, who has worked months to learn the art of bread making?"

When a certain person (who shall remain nameless) first moved over here, his quest for "proper bread" was seemingly endless. I myself received many a queer look from people when I stood in bakery aisles poking loaves of bread trying to find one with a proper crust. (Neither one of us ever succeeded in the quest, by the way.) So, I bake. Fair enough, I did study culinary arts - so it would be appalling if I didn't, but that's not the point at all.

According to Fannie, "Bread is made from flour of wheat, or other cereals, by addition of water, salt, and a ferment." There's no polysorbate 60 or 80, propylene glycol or corn syrup in that list.

I understand the appeal of convenience, but at what cost?

It's not about win or lose.

Yeah yeah, I haven't posted in years. I've always been terrible about blogging - and by the way, how is that even a verb? It's like people using "party" as a verb. Eugh! But, anyway...

I chatted with my cousin this afternoon. (Yes, for all you cynics out there - I do have a family, I was not "spawned".) He's doing well and enjoying his Secret Government Job. Considering what deviants my brother and I are, it never ceases to surprise me that I have a cousin who is an FBI Agent and another with a Secret Government Job. I mean geez! I couldn't even pass the security clearance for an internship with a federal agency. That's fine, I'll just go work for the EU! Who needs the stupid State Department anyway? Hrmph.